Single moms are heroes of the world. So many single mothers are trying to raise wonderful kids every day. They’re trying to make enough money, and they’re trying to help them to become good people.
It’s important to understand that single moms are strong. They didn’t ask to be in that situation, but life happened. There is no need for judgment when we talk about them.
Single moms should be supported and praised. They should be our hope and motivation. They’re doing their best, and sometimes they do it better than the rest of us.
Single Moms Are Heroes An Joy Thomas Moore Is One Of Them
I wanted to say something about the topic of single moms. I wanted to use a great example of Joy Thomas Moore.
Joy Thomas Moore is a successful, editor, writer, and media personality. She is also the president and CEO of JWS Media Consulting.
She lives in Pasadena, Maryland, but she was born in Jamaica. She moved with her parents to New York when she was three years old.
She was always interested in learning and progressing. She went to college, and she tried to make a difference in this world.
She met a man who shared her beliefs. He was even more passionate to do something significant. His name was Bill and Joy married him after two years of dating.
Unfortunately, Bill was using drugs and drinking, and even though she tried to help him, she couldn’t. She gave birth to their child, but Bill didn’t change. He abused Joy and he was an addict. She realized that there was no future for her or her child, so she left him.
After a while, she met Westley Moore, and they fell in love. They got married, and she gave birth to their well-known son Wes Moore.
Westley died when Wes was only three years old. Joy became a single mom, and we can all agree that she did an amazing job.
Her daughter from the first marriage – Nikki is an event planner who owns a company. Her youngest daughter Shani is a legal and business executive, and her son Wes Moore is probably the most famous.
Wes Moore is a best-selling author, politician, non-profit executive, and investment banker. He also worked as a television producer, but right now he is the governor of Maryland.
His book first book – “The Others Wes Moore” – was a huge success. But his mother’s book – “The Power of Presence: Be a Voice in Your Child’s Ear Even When You’re Not With Them” is also amazing.
Now that you know how successful Joy’s children are, you realize that she did a great job. At one point, she sent Wes to a strict military school because he wasn’t on his best behavior. Today, Wes and her other children are grateful for everything she did.
They’re aware that their mother sacrificed herself to give them the best education and the best opportunities. She knew that she was responsible for them. So, she did the best she could.
Her book talks about raising your children so they know what to do even when you’re not there. They should have their mother’s voice in their head at all times.
The power of a mother’s presence is underrated, and it’s essential if you want your child to succeed.
The power of presence means that you’re completely included, devoted, and involved in something. In this case, you should be completely devoted to your children.
It’s important not to get distracted. It’s important to make your kids feel important. Don’t neglect them. Don’t waste your time on social media, phone, or irrelevant things if your child needs you.
Her book talks about seven pillars of presence that Moore finds essential to raising successful children. Those pillars include mind, heart, faith, courage, resources, connectedness, and values.
She shared her story and the stories of 15 other single moms. This book is a great inspiration when you feel overwhelmed with single parenting.
There Aren’t Many Women Like Joy Thompson Moore
Every single mom is a hero and every single mom is doing her best. Many women will say that Joy was lucky and educated. She had a good life and it would be strange if her kids turned out different than they did.
But, every single mom is struggling with something. It’s easier to raise children on your own when you’re educated, but Joy still worked more than one job.
The point is – a single mom will succeed if she gives her 100%. A single mom can’t give up even if she is tired and lost.
Nowadays, many single moms are struggling with basic things. They can’t afford food or clothes, and they can’t go to school because there is nobody to take care of their kids.
In some situations, it seems like there is no way out. It seems like things will never get better. Positivity, hard work, and determination are the keys to success.
There are many stories of women who accomplished great things even though they were broke and uneducated.
Everything would be easier if single moms realized their power. They can do anything and they can become anyone they want. Their path is harder, but it’s important to do better.
Many single mothers have lost hope that things could get better, but that kind of attitude is wrong. Single moms can’t give up. They have to keep pushing themselves because their children need them.
Their children deserve better and it’s important to give them a better future. Single moms are heroes, but they just don’t know it yet.
Focusing On The Children
It’s important to have a life, and it’s important to find happiness, but when you’re a single mother, you have to set your priorities straight. You have to understand that your friends, partners, and other people have to be in the last place.
Your children will have some issues even if you could be the perfect mother. Every child wants to have two parents at some point in their life. That’s why they need a strong mother who will be there to replace everyone, not just their father.
Maybe it’s not fair, but it’s life. It’s something that happened to you and you have to live with it.
Taking a break is good, but you have to devote yourself to your children. So many single moms are spending their time feeling sorry for themselves. Well, that’s not going to help.
Negativity and weakness won’t help you to raise good people. There are always cases where a child turned out fine even though no one took care of it.
But, don’t be that kind of mother. You have to help your child. You have to be there in every moment and you have to help them to find their purpose.
Every person has a lot of potential. Someone is talented for one thing, and someone is talented for another. It’s important to dream big.
You don’t have to pressure your child to become someone important, but you have to be there to tell them that they can be anything. Your child doesn’t have to be a governor or a CEO.
But, try to motivate your child to have a good career. It’s okay to be an artist, a writer, or an actor. It’s okay to be an accountant or an office clerk.
The point is – your kid can become a well-respected member of the society. You don’t have to send your kid to an expensive school, but you have to prioritize their education.
You don’t have to send them to the best college, but you have to give them a chance. If you teach your kids that hard work and persistence are crucial for success, they will be successful even if they attend the worst school.
You have to be their inspiration and strength. You have to find a way to strengthen their faith. Teach them to be diligent and focused. Teach them to aim high in life.
The last thing but also the most important thing is connecting with your kids. You can’t push them and inspire them if you don’t really know them.
You have to know their hopes and dreams. You have to know are they’re introverted or extroverted. You have to learn how to read their body language and facial expressions.
Talk with your kids and try to be relaxed. As a mother, you have to be their parent and their friend. You have to find a way to get through them.
Even though you know better than they do, allow them to have their opinion. Don’t ignore their wishes and try to respect your kids. They will be more confident and less confused when making big life decisions.
Be understanding, supportive, and forgiving. Your kids will be grateful for all that. It may take them some time to realize your sacrifice, but it will happen.
Where Does This Leave Me As A Single Mom?
Being a single mom is hard and you already know it. You can see women who are doing better than you, but you can also find so many women who are doing worse.
The day of a single mother is always unpredictable. Every single parent is always fighting against something or for something.
When people tell you to shift your focus to your kids, their progress, and their development, that seems like normal advice.
But, when you get into all of it, you will realize that you won’t have a lot of time for yourself. Once again, as a single mom, you have to realize that your children are your priority and you have to accept that.
However, you have to find a way to feel happy and good about yourself. You don’t have the luxury to take a lot of breaks and to go out and have fun. You have to be careful with your partner and friends because you have kids.
When you truly accept your role as a single mom, you will find a way to be happy and satisfied. You will find a way to take a break and have some time for yourself.
Try to find a flexible hobby and try to find friends with similar interests and similar obligations.
When you’re looking for a partner, you have to find a mature, responsible man. Don’t dismiss those who are also a single parent. This doesn’t sound too fun, because it looks like living by the rules, but your life will be a lot simpler if you’re responsible and careful as a single mother.
Being a single mom doesn’t define you, but it’s the most important role in your life. Creating a supportive, and loving home for your kids is your main task.
Dating As A Single Mom
If you want to practice the power of presence, you have to commit yourself to raising your kids. As I’ve mentioned, it’s hard to have a normal life as a single woman who is also a single mom.
Luckily, it’s not impossible. You have the right to be happy, loved, and taken care of. As long as you know that your kids come first, everything should be fine.
Many single moms are scared of dating, but sometimes that’s better. It’s not good for you or for your kids to change partners all the time.
If you’re a single mom and you want to date, you will have to be a good planner. Think about your kids. Think about their attitude towards dating.
If the kids are too little, it’s better to hide this part of your life until you’re sure you have the right partner. If they’re bigger, it’s good to talk with them. Being open and honest will help you to feel more comfortable about dating.
The Feeling Of Failure
Sometimes you know what to do to be a good single mom. Sometimes you know what to do to inspire your kids to create a good life for themselves. You know it all, and you’ve read all the books.
You know everything about successful mothers with successful children. But, you feel like your life is a mess. You feel like nothing is working with your kids, and all these stories are just making you feel angry and anxious.
Every single mom wants a good life for her kids, and it’s hard when someone is telling you all these methods that will help you and you already know them.
Sometimes, no matter how hard you work, things aren’t working out for you. You feel like a failure, and you feel like you didn’t do anything to help your kids.
Sometimes the kids are ungrateful and they don’t want to use all the amazing opportunities. There are many reasons for feeling like a failure, but it’s important to shake off that feeling as soon as possible.
First of all, nobody is perfect. It’s good that you’re doing your best, but you can’t control everything.
If your child doesn’t want to work with you, you can’t do much. You can change your approach and your perception but don’t feel bad. Every person and every child is different.
If you feel that you could be doing so much more, and you feel like a failure after reading all those successful single mom stories, that’s good.
That means you have a lot of room for improvement. You can do better and you can change the course of your life.
Everybody deserves a second chance. It’s good that you’re critical and realistic. Be honest with yourself and make an improvement plan.
In some situations, no matter what you do, you won’t be happy with your life. Sometimes, your kids will choose their own path that you don’t like. You will always fight for your children, but it’s important to stay calm.
If they’re happy, healthy, and well, let them be. Maybe you had big dreams for them and maybe you’ve expected more. Maybe you’ve worked two jobs to send them to a good school, and they don’t want to study.
It’s normal to feel frustrated when you’re trying so hard but you don’t see results. When you feel bad and when you feel like you’ve failed, try to find something that’s good in your life.
Be grateful for the small things and try to be positive. Things will be good in the end, and you shouldn’t worry too much.
Father’s Role In Everything
Joy’s story is quite inspirational, but in real life, many fathers are still alive yet they don’t do anything for their kids. It seems like all those difficult things are a mother’s duty. Unfortunately, that’s true.
Single motherhood happens more often than single fatherhood. Child support is based on the father’s salary. If their salary is low, and if they have more kids, the child support feels like a charity.
In many situations, it’s impossible to track the father to ask for child support. Sometimes they don’t want to work because they don’t want to pay child support.
There are many scenarios, but the point is that the fathers are in a better situation. Even when the father is in the picture, the kids usually see him once or twice a week or during holidays.
All those major things are the mother’s problem. When a single mom wants to give her kids a good life, it’s very helpful if the father has the same plan.
First of all, the financial situation is a lot better when both partners want to give their maximum. Next, the mother can do so much more with her life because kids can stay with their father sometimes.
Moms are still responsible for most things, but it’s so much easier when kids have someone else to rely on.
When the father is not interested or he simply isn’t there to support his kids financially or emotionally, the mother has to do everything by herself.
That’s not fair, but a mother won’t give up on her kids. A mother will work even harder so they don’t feel bad because their father decided to step back.
The world we live in needs more justice, but until that happens, single moms have to be the heroes. They have to make plans for everything and they have to do the impossible.
Working On Yourself
Joy raised her kids to be successful and wealthy, but she is also successful and rich. If you’re already a single mom, it seems impossible to find time to work on yourself too.
You want to invest in your children. You want to allow them to grow. But, if you have a lot of potential and if you know that you can be more successful or more educated, go for it.
You will be able to give your kids a better life, and they will be inspired by your accomplishments. They will follow your example and you will be proud of yourself and proud of them.
You deserve an opportunity to achieve your goals and realize your dreams. Of course, you have to be prepared to juggle everything.
It’s hard to work on improving yourself when you’re a single mom. It’s hard to become a better person when you have to prioritize your kids. But, if you’re determined, you will make it.
You are amazing and strong. You have to know your qualities. You have to be confident and bold. When your kids know that you’re so fierce, they will feel invincible and they will accomplish many things.
In Conclusion
Single moms are heroes even when they’re falling apart. Some stories are better than others, and some stories are more inspiring. However, every single mom’s story matters, and as long as a single mother is doing her best, we should be proud of her.
Whenever you feel trapped and unmotivated, it’s good to read a story that will remind you that you can always change things for yourself and your loved ones. You can always start over.
Sources – wttw, Wikipedia, The Washington Informer
Hi all, I am Sidney, an accountant, a hobbyist photographer, and a mother to two sweet girls who are my motivation. I love sharing the tips and tricks I gained all these years I’ve been a mother. I hope it will help you!
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Tuesday 6th of February 2024
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