Skip to Content

Which Parenting Style Is Most Encouraged In Modern America?

Which Parenting Style Is Most Encouraged In Modern America?

Which parenting style is most encouraged in modern America is probably a question you’re asking yourself as a new parent.

Maybe you’re not a parent yet, but you will become one soon. Maybe you’re not a new parent, but you’re interested in learning more about parenting styles.

No matter how much we love our children, sometimes is essential to change our methods and approach.

Luckily, you can find anything online. You can learn from other people’s experiences, and you can find a way to be a better parent.

This article will help you to find your voice as a parent, and you will be more confident in your parenting skills.

Which Parenting Style Is Most Encouraged In Modern America?

A question like which parenting style is most encouraged in modern America has a simple answer – it’s authoritative parenting.

But, keep in mind that there are different parenting styles, and there many ways to parent a child.

Some people decide to follow a style, and others simply find themselves in a certain style. It’s also important to know that kids can be so different that a parent has to have separate parenting styles for each kid.

Most parents think that this is not needed, but if you want to be there for both of your kids and do your best, you have to understand their uniqueness.

Authoritative Parenting Style

The authoritative parenting style is also known as Propagative and democratic parenting. This parenting style is the most popular one for a good reason.

Authoritative parenting is all about setting rules and boundaries for your kids while being supportive and caring.

This is the most effective parenting style for now because it teaches the kids that they can’t do whatever they want.

They realize that everything in life has consequences and they have to be responsible.

On the other hand, parents who use authoritative parenting are open to communication and they offer a lot of understanding and support.

Every child is unique, and some kids won’t respond well to this particular parenting style. This is just something that works for most parents.

If you want to start with an authoritative parenting style, you have to be strict, and clear, and you have to set rules you want your children to follow.

You also have to make an effort to explain everything and you have to find a way that will help your kids realize the difference between right and wrong.

You will have to be patient, persistent, committed, and focused on your parenting goals.

Setting rules is crucial because kids have to know what is off the limits. Of course, sometimes the kids will do something unimaginable that wasn’t on your list of rules.

So, if you feel that this is your parenting style, you need to find some quiet time for yourself and make a plan. Create your rules, and try to make them work.

Write down everything you feel it’s important. Mom planning will be helpful in this situation.

If you want to do this right, prepare for a lot of hard work. According to other people’s experiences, the authoritative parenting style is the most effective but also the hardest one.

You will have to be strict in a situation when you just want to hug your child. On the other hand, you will have to be reasonable and understanding when you’re outraged.

This approach is successful because kids realize that the real world is filled with rules and codes of behavior.

Most kids who are raised using an authoritative parenting style become independent, intelligent, and confident adults.

They had love and support but were also advised to follow the right path.

Many authoritative parents make mistakes when trying to use this parenting style because this style requires a lot of dedication and planning.

You have to be a good cop and a bad cop. You have to be the one who breaks their heart sometimes, but you also have to be the one who will heal them.

I think it’s worth it. It would be great if we could be best friends with our kids while being adored by them, but things are different.

Some kids are well-behaved and they don’t need a lot of parenting to become great. Some kids require different parenting style or a combination of a few parenting styles.

Combining parenting styles is messy, but if you feel that one style is not the best for your child and yourself, go for it.

Personally, I think that an authoritative parenting style creates a perfect balance in the family, and it can lead to true family values if you do it right.

You have to work on your attitude and parenting methods, but that hard work pays off.

Authoritarian Parenting Style

Since the authoritarian parenting style has a similar name to the previous style I’ve mentioned, I will use its other name more often – totalitarian parenting.

If you’re wondering which parenting style is most encouraged in modern America, you won’t get a lot of answers connected to totalitarian parenting.

This parenting style is all about being strict and rigid. This style of parenting was popular in the past.

The parents who approve of totalitarian parenting don’t care about their children’s opinions and feelings. Some of them don’t even have rules, they just punish the kids when they do something wrong.

The children have to learn the rules on the go. In this case, parents want ultimate obedience and respect.

They think it’s good that children are afraid of them and they want to control their kids’ life.

This parenting style is usually not so effective. Most kids learn how to be good liars and they have problems with confidence and trust.

Authoritarian parenting also approves harsh punishment and actions without explanation. That means that parents don’t acknowledge their children.

They do what they want, and they want to look like a boss in every situation. Some people think it’s good to do this, but your kids will grow up and they will resent you.

Many people who grew up in strict families are traumatized, and as a consequence of that, they let their children do anything.

They don’t want to be like their parents, but they don’t understand that some control, respect, and rules are good for everyone.

Some people think that a totalitarian style of parenting is great for problematic kids, but that would be a quick fix.

Every child needs understanding, guidance, and explanations. They need a good example and they need to understand why certain things are wrong.

This is why many people use an authoritative parenting style – it gives them flexibility, solutions, and best of the both worlds.

I don’t suggest a totalitarian parenting style because it usually backfires, and problems worsen.

In the past, people were different and authoritarian parents were a normal thing, and it’s a bit silly to expect modern kids to be super obedient.

Permissive Parenting Style

Permissive parenting sounds much better compared to a totalitarian parenting style. It doesn’t involve punishments and being harsh.

Many modern parents would say the permissive parenting style is better than the authoritative one.

Everybody has the right to choose, but permissive parenting could cause many complications along the way.

Permissive parenting means letting your kids do whatever they want. You’re only there to give love, support, and understanding.

You exist to satisfy their needs and you give them unlimited freedom, time, money, and resources.

People who approve of a permissive parenting style believe that it will help the kids to become more independent. They think that kids will be more confident and decisive.

They want their kids to feel amazing about themselves, and they want them to enjoy life simply.

Some parents use the permissive style not because they want their kids to be free and independent but because they don’t want to be negative characters.

Of course, this is not a solution. Even if you agree that permissive parenting is beneficial, you have to realize that most kids raised this way lack discipline and structure.

Most of them aren’t successful later in life and they have problems with relationships. They think they’re better than others and they want to control everything and everyone.

They’re not realistic in most cases which is a problem in adult life. Their self-esteem is based on unimportant things and that creates problems in communicating with others.

For this reason, permissive parenting can create permanent problems, and you could ruin your child’s life. Other people don’t care about your child’s wishes as you do.

Some parents use permissive parenting not because they think it’s good, but because they don’t want to be the bad guys.

They want to be cool and supportive. They’re afraid of their child’s opinion. This is wrong on so many levels because nobody loves a child more than a parent, but parents have to be responsible and critical.

I don’t recommend this parenting style, and most experts don’t recommend it. It can cause many problems in your family, and it’s not the right way to show your child your unlimited love.

Neglectful Parenting Style

If you want to know which parenting style is most encouraged in modern America, you’re definitely not a neglectful parent.

But, some neglectful parents don’t care. You can’t say they’re using a certain style. They don’t take good care of their kids and that’s a simple explanation of this parenting style.

Neglectful parenting style can be different. Some people don’t even care what their kids are eating, whether are they dressed well, whether are they cold, or if they’re sick.

This is so wrong, and authorities should handle this as soon as possible.

However, some parents are neglectful in a different way. They give their kids everything they need.

Kids have food, a roof over their heads, and everything they want, and they seem well taken for.

But, some parents provide these things for their kids but they’re not interested in their kid’s life. Nothing gets to them, and they don’t care about their child’s mistakes or achievements.

In many cases of neglectful parenting, someone else takes care of children and their material and emotional needs. But, we all know that kids need their parents.

No matter how great is someone else, we all want our parent’s love and approval. As you can see, a neglectful parenting style is something that shouldn’t be an option for anyone with some common sense.

Balanced Parenting Style

One of the most flexible parenting styles in modern America is the balanced parenting style. This style is a combination of all the other parenting styles a parent likes.

I’ve mentioned that combining parenting styles is hard and it can end up horrible, but with a lot of work and planning, it’s not impossible.

If you want to create the perfect balance between parenting styles, you should explore the stages of parenting.

By doing that, you will know what to expect in each stage, and which parenting methods are the best.

Every parenting style requires your dedication and commitment. This one is the most flexible because you’re the one who creates it.

It’s just hard to plan it out in the beginning. A balanced parenting style means you will be a permissive parent in some situations, and authoritative in others.

A neglectful parenting style is never a good idea. Ignoring young kids in some situations can be effective, but true neglect is not welcomed.

Learning about Montessori parenting is also a great way to educate yourself about parenting tricks, tips, and hacks.

A totalitarian parenting style should be avoided.

But, if you’re parenting a difficult child and sometimes you have to take complete control in order to prevent some chaos, you can apply the authoritarian parenting style.

Make sure to follow this style only when it’s needed because using it all the time won’t give you a lot of positive results.

This probably seems like the best parenting style, but you have to plan it thoroughly and make it work. You have to be mentally and emotionally strong to switch easily from style to style.

How To Choose The Best Parenting Style?

Some people always knew they would be authoritarian parents or authoritative parents. Some people always knew that their style of parenting would be unique.

Others knew that they would combine different styles of parenting.

But, some people have no idea which parenting style to choose. They don’t know how to parent a child successfully.

They feel overwhelmed, but they know that being a parent means you have to make decisions you don’t like so much.

When choosing a style of parenting, parents have to be realistic. You have to know what kind of person you are. You have to choose a style of parenting that you can do.

Also, you have to choose a style that works for your children. No matter how badly you want to practice a certain style, you have to choose the one that works.

For example, you want to be an authoritarian parent, but your child’s behavior is only getting worse when you apply this parenting style.

Maybe you want to be a permissive parent, but your child is breaking all the rules and exposing other people to problems, you have to think of some strict rules.

You have to be critical and admit some things to yourself even if you don’t like them. You can create your parenting style combined with other styles.

You can choose a style and move to another one if you see that it isn’t working.

The most important thing is to stay calm and accept the fact that you will make mistakes. People make mistakes and nobody’s perfect.

You’re in charge of another human being, and it’s not possible for everything to be great.

I’ve mentioned that having more than one kid can also be problematic. Nobody is identical, but some kids are so different that you have to choose different techniques to raise them.

So, be positive and find the best parenting methods for yourself. One thing to remember is to show love and care.

Children raised in families where love was always present are much happier and more successful. For this reason, always add a lot of love to your parenting style.

It’s Important To Be Confident

Confidence is important in every area of your life. When you’re confident, you’re more motivated and decisive.

Other people see you differently, and achieving your goals is easier. Confidence in choosing a parenting style is very significant.

When you find someone who seems like a person to have a family with, you have to discuss some basic methods of raising kids. Of course, you don’t know for sure what will happen when you have kids, but some things should be said in the beginning.

People with different backgrounds get together more than you think, and it’s important to have some expectations and share them with that person.

But, since you never know what kind of a mom you will be, things can change. When you and your partner have a child, or you’re about to have one, it’s important to agree on parenting techniques.

There will be situations where the two of you will have different opinions, but being there for each other and working as a team is crucial.

If you and your partner are having a hard time when it comes to parenting styles, you have to be confident. You have to stand up for yourself, but at the same time, be open to compromise.

Think about your issues, and decide what happens next. Be confident in your decisions. If you want to stick with your choice of parenting style, stand tall and have a lot of self-esteem.

If you’re willing to compromise and you’re flexible, you should be confident in this situation. You know what you’re doing, and everybody should see that.

Choosing a parenting style with your partner is not as hard as it seems. There is something harder than this, and this is dealing with the rest of the family.

People judge people.

People question other people’s choices, and that shouldn’t bother you.

Don’t waste your time and energy on critics and disrespect when you know what you want.

Don’t let them get to you. However, when a family member does more than just talk, you must be cautious.

You have to let everyone know that you’re in charge. No matter how much they love your children, you love them more.

If they want to cause problems in your family, then they shouldn’t be a part of your life.

This is not just about someone getting too involved. This is not about being angry at someone. It’s about the fact that people getting involved and undermining could cause negative consequences.

Children aren’t mature to understand things like adults. You don’t need an argument with your child because someone else did something that’s not according to your parenting style.

Confidence and dedication will save your mental health. Your kids and other people will respect you more, and you will feel better.

When you decide what you want, make it happen and stick to it. Don’t be insecure and always work on improving yourself as a parent.


When choosing a style of parenting, parents have to think of so many things. Deciding on these things is stressful but important. Some parents don’t want to make final decisions, so they just go with the flow.

That can turn out well, but only if you’re lucky. Having a vision of your parenting path is a much better thing.

But don’t expect perfection in whatever method and style of parenting you choose. Parenting is hard, and there is no recipe for it. You have to be flexible, and you have to be persistent no matter what happens.

You will fail, and you will be disappointed. You will be sad, and things won’t turn out how you want them to. But that’s life, and that’s normal.

Being a parent is the most difficult job, but it’s also the most beautiful experience in life. If you’re a tired mom, some affirmations for moms might boost your energy.

Modern times brought us some amazing things, but doing everything the right way is very challenging.

which parenting style is most encouraged in modern america

What Is A Bonus Mom? • Mama Bean Parenting

Thursday 20th of April 2023

[…] is different and there are different parenting styles. Don’t give up too […]