Here are my 4 Rules as a strict and stern mom

My general philosophy of parenting is that rules allow children to progress because children know what to expect from their parents.

And, believe it or not, in the rules I’ve created for my family, we always have a lot of fun.

I’ve got three kids.

If there are no rules and boundaries, chaos quickly ensues.

And once chaos sets in, stress and screaming follow.

But I refuse to spend my days yelling at my children.

I’m proud of the rules I impose on my family.

Many moms consider me too strict, but our way of life suits our family.

So I don’t let anyone dictate my philosophy.

Over time, I’ve come to realize that these rules benefit my children far more than they limit or disadvantage them.

The world can sometimes be a scary place, and when you’re a mom, endless worry can keep you up all night.

Just taking the kids to school can overwhelm me if I think about all the things that can happen when they’re away from me.

From school shootings to child predators, violent children and even online abuse, the potentially horrific situations in which children can be hurt are endless.

That’s why I don’t want to apologize to my children or to society for being a very strict mother.

Sure, my kids often complain about my long list of rules, but that doesn’t worry me at all.

I know that my over-protective behavior is necessary to keep my children safe for as long as possible.

What’s more, I’m convinced that my austerity benefits my children far more than it limits them.

When it comes to raising my three children, aged seven, four and three, here are my four most important rules:

1. No cell phone use

Of course, not forever.

But my daughter, who is in primary school, says she’s the only child in the class who doesn’t have her cell phone.

That’s great.

I’m rather proud of that.

I understand that she thinks it’s unfair compared to the others.

But I don’t care what her peers think it’s uncool.

Why wouldn’t they?

Because they send each other memes on a Viber group.

They gossip about their peers and insult each other royally.

And the only reason I know about it is because the teacher has informed all the parents to warn them about this kind of harassment.

I got my first cell phone when I enrolled at university.

Of course, I don’t plan to wait that long to buy her a cell phone – I understand that the world has changed a lot since my college days!

But I don’t see the need for a cell phone right now.

If I can keep her away from social networks and potential bad influences for a while, then I will.

The only reason she should have a cell phone is to contact me in an emergency.

But I think there are other ways of doing that.

2. No afternoon playtime with a child whose parents I don’t know

For me, this rule is vital!

I won’t allow a parent I don’t know to “pick up” my child from school, nor will I pick up my children and take them to people I don’t know.

I’d rather my kids play with fewer kids than leave them in unfamiliar homes and regret later if something happens that I don’t like.

Before you call me crazy, consider that early in my motherhood, I discovered an unfortunate incident in which my brother’s daughter was forced to take off her pants at her new friend’s house.

Why was this?

To prove she wasn’t a boy!

Let’s just say that since then, I don’t want to apologize for being too cautious.

We can’t turn a blind eye to all the abuse that goes on.

Whether it’s violent, toxic parents or worse…

Whether it’s intrusive or disrespectful playmates.

Before allowing my children to go to someone’s home, I want to get to know the parents and observe their child.

3. No sleepovers at friends’ houses

I want to know that my children are under my roof and that they are safe when I go to sleep.

My children can sleep with their grandparents or with people I’ve known very well for a long time.

But when it comes to spending the night with friends, that’s out of the question.

In fact, many mothers have told me that they too are afraid to let their children sleep over at a friend’s house, but that they let them go because they want to please them.

I refuse to do that…

I refuse to spend my life regretting an incident simply because I wanted to please.

Fortunately, these issues aren’t common under our roof and I can get more comfortable with time.

But even if I didn’t, there’s no reason for me to accept something like this and worry all night.

There will be plenty of time to worry when my kids go off to college one day.

4. My kids go to bed early

I don’t want my kids to spend their evenings watching TV or playing games.

The day is long and they have plenty of time to do whatever they like.

Of course, in certain circumstances, they do have to stay up later.

But that’s exceptional!

But why?

Because I firmly believe that my children need their sleep, and that there’s no reason why they should be awake, tired, cranky for a long time and making bad decisions the next day.

Ultimately, kids need strict rules to grow up, not a bunch of freedom to create their own schedules.

The exceptions when I allow myself to go to bed later are family vacations.

In all other cases, even at weekends, going to bed at a reasonable hour is part of life when I’m a mom.

My three children go to bed at 8:00 pm.

At 7:30 p.m., we read a story and at 8:00 p.m., the lights go out.

This routine is also good for my mental health and for the loving relationship I have with their dad.

My general philosophy of parenting is that rules allow children to progress because children know what to expect from their parents.

What’s more, rules also give parents a little peace of mind in a scary, out-of-control environment.

Our family community is close and loving, with a full schedule of activities and social arrangements.

I encourage my children to try new things and be good friends, but also good people.

But not in unfamiliar homes or after 8 p.m.